Kindly

Ephesians 4:32

Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.

Let’s not leave this kindness topic just yet. In fact, for those of you who do word studies, look this one up on BibleGateway.com (There is also a link to Bible Gateway on my website). You will be impressed at how many times God brings this up.

Today’s verse gives us a little better insight into what kindness looks like in application. The first is so obvious that we sometimes miss it. Kindness is Christ. As we read the scriptures and watch his interactions with the world we begin to see what a sanctified life really looks like. Jesus was moved by compassion. That means that he did something. He was moved to do something. Also, though, let us not lose sight of the fact that he felt compassionately. What does that mean but that he allowed his heart to feel something for someone else’s situation. Of course, we know that love is not selfish but when I think of Jesus experiencing emotions based on a life not his own it makes me think how I should be less absorbed with how I feel about my world. It also highlights for me that Jesus was a person of emotion rather than one of a stoic stiff upper lip. We should feel and those emotions should not be spent only on our own stuff.

Secondly, God wants us to be tender-hearted. What? Does He not realize we are western, rugged individualists? What is He thinking? I remember a commercial from many years ago were the announcer declared that something was “rough and tough like alligator bags.” I was young and was influenced by that slogan. I thought we were all supposed to be rough and tough. I have worked on it for many years now and believe I have developed proficiency in this only to find that Abba, Father wants me to be tender-hearted! What a kick in the teeth. Don’t you feel like you open yourself up to being hurt if you go through life tender-hearted? Well, I certainly did but I am learning a new reality, a reality born of the Kingdom of God rather than of the world. It turns out that when we live in the Spirit, walking hand in hand with him, he cares for our hearts. We can be tender because he has our hearts in his hands. Who knew?

Kindness is important to God. If it is important to Him then it stands to reason that it should be important to us as well. Is it? Have we ever prayed asking Him to teach us and lead us in kindness? Most of us need that kind of help. There are some of you who are just nice but the rest of us need direction. We can no longer be self-centered and achieve a kind heart because kindness requires us to think of other people’s needs and comfort. This is an area that we really must proactively pursue with God. It may not always be easy but it is the way of God’s heart.

The Simple Truth

Proverbs 19:22

What is desirable in a man is his kindness, and it Is better to be a poor man than a liar.

I appreciate when God is very clear about what He wants in and from us and this verse certainly meets that litmus test. Obviously there are two parts to this. First, kindness is a premium value in God’s heart. We saw from our study of 1 Corinthians 13 that one of God’s characteristics is that He is kind. He wants us to be people of kindness too. Maybe He even expects it of us.

Kindness is one of those things which can be demonstrated in many ways. Often, kindness is found in the small matters. I think of it as preferring others’ comfort. Some people seem to have a talent for doing the small things that just make you feel better. Others of us are going to have to be purposeful about kindness. Sometimes kindness is found in the way we speak to others and well as the way we behave. The thing we can do is to ask our Father to teach us about His kindness and then be sensitive to how He leads us.

The second part of this verse really amazes me. One might expect that this is a message which never need be spoken and yet I am continually amazed at how Christians will bend the truth, avoid the truth, deceive, mislead and even outright lie. If you looked up the things God hates last week then you know that two of them are liars (Proverb 6: 16 – 19). With that staring at us, how can we still play around with this. God tells us it is better to be poor than a liar, this coming from a guy who paves His driveway with gold. Jesus told us that lies and lying are of the devil (John 8: 44) so we must do whatever is necessary to walk in the truth.

Do you think it odd that these two ideas are contained in the same sentence? It is as if God says to us that we cannot accomplish the first directive, to be kind, without first abolishing lies from our lives. And here is a news flash, just in case you didn’t know, many times, most times probably, people know when you are lying to them. They may not say anything to you (probably because they are exercising kindness) but they know. Think of that the next time you are tempted to lie. Just think, “This person is going to know that I am lying to them”. If that does not help you restrain yourself, then we need to have another discussion and that one will also involve the word kindness.

Because we truly love our Father, we want to please Him. Well, today’s verse is a prescription for doing just that. Honor others around you by telling them the truth and being kind. Remember, you do not have to do it on your own. Your Dad is happy to help you.

God is . . . kind

1 Corinthians 13: 4

Love is patient, love is kind.

Kindness is a consistent theme all through the Bible. God has continually shown His kindness to mankind. In the 25th Psalm David wrote, “Remember, O Lord, Your compassion and Your lovingkindnesses, For they have been from of old” (v. 6). David recognized and proclaimed that the kindness of God has been ever present. He has a heart of compassion towards us in all of life’s situations. There is never a moment in our lives, has never been a minute in all of history when the Lord’s thoughts towards us have not been thoughts of kind compassion.

What does the word “kind” bring to your mind? One observation from my dictionary is that it takes many words to describe kindness: 1. Of a friendly nature; generous or hospitable; warmhearted; good. 2. Charitable; helpful; showing sympathy or understanding. 3. Humane; considerate. 4. Forbearing; tolerant; charitable. 5. Courteous; thoughtful. It goes on but one other description included is that kindness shows a desire to promote others’ welfare.

Our Father is all of these things. I especially like the idea that His intent is to promote our welfare. If you really want to get the big picture of God’s kindness, run a thesaurus on each of the words from the dictionary. Already we see that kindness involves being aware of other people and their needs. God didn’t call us to Himself so that we could meet His needs. He calls us to Him so that He can care and provide for us. He is gentle and generous. He is tolerant rather than critical. Psalm 25: 10 reads, “All the paths of the lord are lovingkindness and truth to those who keep His covenant and His testimonies.” All that He thinks, all that He does is bathed in kindness.

Knowing God’s essential traits will help you to relate to Him better. I hope it will also cause you to trust Him at a deeper level. He is safe. He is kind.

Enough is Enough

Titus 3: 4 – 5

But when the kindness of God our Savior and His love for mankind appeared, He saved us, not on the basis of deeds which we have done in righteousness, but according to His mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewing by the Holy Spirit.

Brother this is the good news of the gospel. We were not saved on the basis of our deeds, our righteousness or our worthiness. God’s sweet mercy saved us. God sent His own Spirit to wash us clean. The Holy Spirit has regenerated and renewed you. What is so interesting about this is that he did this for you before you were ever born. That is why no amount of future sin can steal your salvation. Only you can give away your sanctification. Jesus has already paid for the sin that you commit tomorrow or next Tuesday. He has already paid for the sin of the person who is right now unborn, even unconceived. No one has to earn this salvation and no one could. We know that intellectually but we sometimes stumble over our day to day application of it.

It was God’s kindness and His love for humanity that saved us. Some people who have already been saved run around trying to be worthy of that great and awesome gift. Stop! There is nothing any of us can do to merit all that the Father, Jesus and the Holy Spirit have done for us. This is simply an expression of our guilty conscious. Why are we trying to earn what they have already given us for free? We should want to be a blessing to God’s kids because of the happiness which overflows as result of all God has done for us. None of that, however, will ever make us worthy of the great sacrifice God and Jesus made for us. So, we just need to get used to the idea that despite our unworthiness, our Father loves us and He sent His beloved to save us. That was enough for Him and should be enough for us.

Putting on the Ritz

Colossians 3: 12 – 13

And so, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you.

We are the chosen of God. We have been adopted into the family of God by the sacrifice of the Lord Jesus and we are now joint heirs with Abraham. We are holy and beloved. Therefore, God wants us to walk in a manner worthy of our high calling. We are to put on the character of Jesus and walk in Him and in the manner of his calling on us. Our lives should be typified by compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, patience and forgiveness. For these are the characteristics of Christ himself and the life we now live we live in Him. If anyone is lacking in any of these attributes, he should ask of the Lord Jesus and he who gives all freely will anoint you with all you need so that you might also walk in all the grace which he has poured out on mankind. It is a high calling to walk in this kind of grace and fellowship. It is the high calling of Jesus on our lives. So put on Christ and be transformed.

God’s Classroom

Philippians 2: 3 – 5

Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind let each of you regard one another as more important than himself;  do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others.   Have this attitude in yourselves which was also in Christ Jesus.

This is so counter-cultural that, frankly, it is difficult for us to incorporate it into our lifestyle. We are actually supposed to put the needs and desires of others before our own wants. For most of us this is beyond difficult. In truth, we rarely even recognize the opportunities which pass by us, opportunities to be a little less selfish. I received one of those opportunities recently and it gave me a chance to examine whether my theology was integrated into my lifestyle or just a collection of pretty thoughts and ideals.

I had to take my car in for routine maintenance. I took my book hoping that I could get a little of my class reading done while awaiting my car. Well, there is a television in the waiting room. I usually prefer not to have a television on so that I can read without distraction. But you know what – it’s not all about me. There were other people there waiting for their cars too. At first it appeared that no one was listening to the TV so I was going to ask them if they minded me turning the volume down. No sooner, however, did I think that thought than this scripture came to mind. Why did the situation need to revolve around my desires or even needs. “Well,” I thought, “if no one is listening to it, what does it bother for me to ask?” But God responded to me instantly. Have you ever noticed that when you really don’t want to hear God it is really easy to hear His voice? Well, anyway, God showed me that the other people there, though they did not appear to be paying attention to the TV, might be enjoying having it on in the background. If I had asked they likely would have consented even though it wasn’t what they wanted. My pursuit of my desires would have put them in an awkward position where they may feel compelled to consent. Why should the world bend and contort to meet my perceived needs?

All of this happened in a flash but I knew this was a point of personal growth. What was more important to me, reading my Christian book for my doctorate in Theology or living my theology? Was it better to put my need for silence at the forefront or to let Jesus lead me and teach me about his divine outlook? Happily Dad spoke in my ear before I could open my mouth. Would it have been a huge sin had I put my needs first? Well, I don’t know. A sin is a sin, isn’t it? I don’t think Dad would have been horribly mad at me but He would see that I just wasn’t ready to grow up. 

As it turns out, I learned more not getting to do my homework than had I imposed my will on the others. Look around you today. Are there ways you can be a blessing to others? Maybe it is just about not being so concerned about what you want or what you perceive you need. There is an opportunity out there for each of us. I hope you find yours.

Spiritual Requirements

Micah 6: 8

He has told you, O man, what is good, and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?

It turns out that it really isn’t all that difficult to figure out how to be a good Christian. We have the words of Jesus. We listen to his words and do them. Even in the Old Testament days, before Jesus was manifested in the earth, God sent His word to guide us. Through the prophet Micah God revealed His will for us; walk humbly with our God, do justice and extend lovingkindness. Now what is difficult about that? 

Notice that God said to walk “with” Him. That is interesting. Many times I hear people say, “Walk humbly before your God,” but that is not what God said. His directive to us is to walk “with” Him. 

Secondly, be a just person. You can decide for yourself what that means but at a simple level it means to be fair to people. That is not really a difficult concept. I hear people say so often, “Well, life isn’t fair,” and they use that as justification to treat people unfairly. My response is, “Try to sell that land to God.” I don’t think He will buy that argument. He is a fair God and He requires us to treat people fairly as well. 

Last, be a kind person. Be kind to others. This one requirement is so broad, so vast in scope that it will cause us to reflect the essential nature of God in everything we do. Kindness is generated through love. In every single human interaction, be kind. That means be kind to your spouse, your children, your boss, your employees, the guy who cuts the grass, the woman who cleans the house, the clerk at the store, and on and on. Think of all of the people you come in contact with during a single day. Some of them you may not even particularly like but if you are a child of God you will show lovingkindness to every single one of them.