The Weaker Sex

1 Peter 3: 7

Husbands, in a similar way, live with your wives with understanding since they are weaker than you are.

Happy Weaker Sex Day!! I hope you laughed when you read that. I have to laugh. You certainly wouldn’t walk through my YMCA and come away with the idea that women are weak, even physically. I look around the classes and the women are fit and strong. I wouldn’t like to be the person who walked into our Y proclaiming that women should bow to men because women are weaker. The person who does that better workout every day because at any time there will be dozens of women who can demonstrate the fallacy of that statement.

I watch these women walking into the Y with one child on their hip, pushing another in a stroller and with two bags over their shoulders. It is truly amazing. Then they go into class and press an impressive amount of weight and just leave you speechless. And this isn’t the rare case. There are dozens of women who are strong physically as well as emotionally and mentally.

My friend, Ann Musico (author of Today is Still the Day), said recently that women are the ones who typically suffer from adrenal failure because they are so over-extended. Women take care of their children, husbands, parents, husband’s parents, and the home. Besides that, they work and volunteer at church and with civic organizations. They are the people volunteering to help with special events, committee work, prayer teams, the kids’ soccer league. It’s practically endless. In fact, I think sometimes women do too much and that is what Ann was eluding too. It can compromise one’s health. Then some idiot says, “See there, women are physically weak.”

We have all heard the “weaker sex” banter but by now all but the really obtuse realize that women are not the weaker gender. Some men can lift more weight than some women, but I would not even make a blanket statement that men are physically stronger than women, especially when it comes to leg strength. Physically, women’s endurance is phenomenal. I watch these mother’s work night and day taking care of everyone else and still make time to get in their workout. I really don’t know how they do it and it is exhausting to even think about.

The real point is that today’s verse was an admonition to honor women though it has been used to abuse them so, let’s make sure we get this right, once and for all. You only have to read a few translations to see what this verse was meant to say. I picked a translation today which got it wrong.  Others do a much better job with this verse.  Some, like the Complete Jewish Bible make the distinction about the physical strength disparity between men and women but, at the same time, minimizes it, “Although your wife may be weaker physically, you should respect her as a fellow-heir of the gift of Life. If you don’t, your prayers will be blocked.” The point which is made in all the versions is that husbands should honor their wives. The failure to do so will inhibit, even block their prayers. That is a huge deal, but we haven’t heard this verse taught this way very often. We hear a nauseatingly huge number of sermons about women being submissive to husbands though. Peter made it very clear that women are joint heirs. As joint heirs they should be treated equally, one translation says, or better still with honor. That is the point.

Women are strong. Don’t be fooled. And they are worthy of honor. And so, with that on my mind I say to all of you mothers, Happy Mother’s Day!!!

Grace for Women

John 4: 17 – 18

The woman answered and said, “I have no husband.” Jesus said to her, “You have correctly said, ‘I have no husband’; for you have had five husbands, and the one whom you now have is not your husband; this you have said truly.”

I was listening to Christian music the other day when a song played that recounted this episode. The song lyric said, “Jesus told her of all her sin.” Honestly, it was a pretty song and well sung, but this lyric grieved my heart. I thought of other Bible references about women. Women often portrayed in an unfavorable light. Even Mary Magdalene, a devout follower of Jesus, is referred to as a prostitute, but was she? The worst thing of all, at least to me, is that we carry these ideas forward and continue to judge these women harshly. One understands that in biblical times, women were not treated equally or even fairly. The culture of those times sanctified treating women as property for that is what they were. Further, there were few ways for women to support themselves. Primarily there were two: marriage or prostitution, which, in truth, offers little difference between the two. Either way, women traded sex for their sustenance.

We harshly judge the woman in this story, but we must understand that women had very little power over their persons or their lives. The only way this woman could support herself was prostitution or to be the companion, married or not, to a man. How many opportunities did this woman have to buy food and provide shelter for herself? Could she force this man to marry her? Maybe she pestered him daily to marry her, but he refused. What was she to do?

Now, for generations people have judged and criticized her but little do we understand her predicament. Little compassion is offered women of the Bible and even less comprehension. There are feminine heroes in the Bible. Consider Ester and Ruth but in large part, the appearance of women in often accompanied by judgment. Jesus is the great exception. If you read of his life, you will notice he had women companions and treated women fairly. Even more astounding is that time after time, he refused to judge them. This is one of the ways we need to follow in his footsteps.

The message I wish to convey in today’s Word of the Day is two-fold. First, we have an opportunity to greet the women of the Bible without judgment or criticism. Secondly, for all the women who read these passages and are troubled by them, Jesus has redeemed you and purchased your freedom with his own life. The Bible says, “But many who are first will be last; and the last, first,” (Matthew 19: 30). In Jesus’ eyes women are not second-class citizens. Some of his closest supporters were women. In fact, women were the first ones to preach the gospel. They were the ones who found the stone rolled away and the tomb empty. So understand, you are not second class with Jesus. He very much honors and respects women.

Also, God loves you like He loves Jesus. You are precious in His sight. We may have thousands of years of damaged, sin-infested Christians and Jews who left a legacy of enslaving and marginalizing women, but God has not had even one day or one thought of women being anything less than competent and lovely in His eyes.

When you read your Bible, remember the environment women in Biblical times existed in and cut them some slack. Jesus did not judge them, and neither should we. What I find objectionable is that we characterize Bible women as sinners and overlook the sin of men of the Bible. Let’s stop majoring on women as sinners for all have sinned and fallen short of God’s glory (Romans 3: 23). Instead, we can honor their contributions. We don’t have to be in denial about where people are falling short, but we really should stop relegating women. It is almost as if we look for their crimes and overlook their accomplishments while overlooking the sins of the men to focus on their accomplishments. Read the whole story of this woman in John. She evangelized her town. She took the good news to the men of the town. But for her, none in the town of Sychar have heard the good news about Messiah, none would have gotten saved. To make it an even more amazing story, Sychar was a Samarian town and Jews of that time had nothing to do with Samaritans. Jesus, however, stayed two days in that town. Though disparaged for generations, this Samaritan woman evangelized a whole town. How many disciples can that be said of?

Outcasts and Samaritans

John 4: 9 – 10

Therefore the Samaritan woman said to Him, “How is it that You, being a Jew, ask me for a drink since I am a Samaritan woman?” (For Jews have no dealings with Samaritans.) Jesus answered and said to her, “If you knew the gift of God, and who it is who says to you, ‘Give Me a drink,’ you would have asked Him, and He would have given you living water.”

It is rare that I can read this passage without stopping to consider all that was going on here. Truly, it is difficult for us to appreciate how strange the setting is for this exchange. Clearly, the Samaritan woman was surprised that Jesus even condescended to speak to her.

Jesus cared little for the prejudices of the day. If you look at his own crew you will find women and tax collectors. It may be hard for some to appreciate this, but women were considered property, even in this, the land of the free, until just two generations ago. They were chattel, the property of a man, like a mule or a cow. They had no right to vote and had no say in their own governance. This was the very reason the colonists rebelled against colonial England, but the reasoning did not extend to women. For all that the former Africans were held in slavery and mistreated, their men ended up faring better under the voting act than did women. They became “Free men” but women, all women, were still considered property.

It may be quite hard for you to wrap your mind around the lowly existence of women because now we witness successful women in almost every walk of life. That is not the way of the past though and Jesus well knew that women were considered a sub-class of humans. To compound things, there was great dissension between Jews and Samaritans such that Jews didn’t even speak to Samaritans. Jews would usually detour around Samaritan towns so as to avoid contact with the disgraceful Samaritans.

Yet, here we find Jesus asking water of a Samaritan, and a woman to boot and even asking at a Samaritan well. There is nothing “right” in this scenario. He did everything a “good” Jew shouldn’t. The woman was stunned, as well she might be. “Why are you even speaking to me,” she questioned. “I am a woman and a Samaritan besides.” None of that mattered to Jesus. Remember too that Jesus told us that he did nothing apart from his Father. He only did those things he saw His Father do, said only those things his Father said. That necessarily means that this entire encounter was approved and ordained by God, the Father. God wanted an encounter with this woman. Yahweh arranged this meeting. At first glance it appears that Jesus was at the well seeking water but Jesus was there to offer water, living water. What is this living water? The exchange between this woman and Jesus is the Kingdom of God in a nutshell. Jesus came to earth to offer the healing, living water that is the Holy Spirit to all the lowly, oppressed, marginalized, ostracized and forlorn of the world. He came to give himself to those whom society wants to cast out. He is the meekest of all human beings, reaching out to those whom the world finds little value for. This woman was not a member of the right caste, group, economic strata, gender or even race. Still Jesus stopped and conversed with her. He offered himself to her though she was not privileged, did nothing to earn his attention and was not even of the chosen race. The Jews had reason to expect his graces but she had no standing to attain even the smallest blessing of the Father. Do you see how out of bounds this exchange was?

Jesus constantly aggravated the religious folks by fraternizing with people they considered beneath them, people they considered undeserving. They thought he should sup with them but he was hanging out with the riff-raff, those whose hearts were open to him and who needed the touch of the Lord. He knew the religious folks’ hearts were stone having, in their own minds, ascended to the status of worthiness. We now know, though sometimes fail to recall, that none of us is worthy. None of us are entitled to anything apart from Jesus’ grace and the kindness of the Father. We are all as lowly and useless as a Samaritan woman. Those who hold themselves above this standard, are the Pharisees of today. Jesus’ hand reaches out to us all, even the most lowly and it is in our acceptance of our own unworthiness that we find the grace which lifts us up to kinship with Jesus and heirs according to his promise. The great paradox of worthiness is that in my unworthiness, I became worthy. In my unrighteousness, I became the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus. Nothing in myself made me in the least worthy of his kindness but like that poor Samaritan woman, we are all lifted up in the simple act of taking his hand. There is none worthy, no not even one, except in him and then we are shining jewels, the very luster of which is glimpsed in the Father’s eyes. Though none is worthy, all are welcome.

Whomever we wish to restrict or cast from our congregations are the very ones Jesus is associating with to this day, the ones he seeks. They may be like Zacchaeus whom Jesus called down from the tree to entertain Jesus and his friends. They may be like this Samaritan, seemingly with no rights to salvation or access to Jesus. We must understand that Jesus has come specifically for those people. Those who look amazingly like we did at one time. He is the God of the underdog, the downtrodden, the disfavored and unworthy. This story has great import for us because we risk becoming like the Pharisees if we fail to recognize Jesus’ heart, meaning that which is most important to him. He came to have dinner with the people we don’t want in our churches or in our homes. We must take care that we do not become hard hearted like the Pharisees of Jesus’ times or we may find that we, too, are on the outside looking in.

My Kingdom For . . .

2 Chronicles 10: 7

And they spoke to him, saying, “If you will be kind to this people and please them and speak good words to the, then they will be your servants forever.”

King Solomon has died and his son Rehoboam has succeeded him to the throne. He consulted with the elders regarding how to deal with the people. Today’s verse is the advice they gave. Unfortunately, he did not have his father’s wisdom and did not receive the elders counsel. Instead he turned to the young men, his friends and contemporaries, and asked their advice. The young men gave opposite advice to which Rehoboam acceded. Thus begins the fall of the lineage of David. In one generation the throne will be torn from David’s family although God’s intent was that an heir of David would sit on the throne of Israel forever. This great fall begins right here, with a young man not listening to the wisdom and advice of the elders.

Today’s passage is one of the best instructions on interpersonal relationships ever. Look at it closely. If we will be kind to people, endeavor to be pleasing to them and speak good words then they will turn to us favorably and be dedicated to us forever. You don’t need a weekend course on interpersonal relationships (though that is good). If we will dissect this one statement we will hold the keys to good relationships. And consider this, these elders, the ones that Rehoboam ignored, are the men that served with King Solomon, the wisest man ever. They learned under an administration that knew incredible success and wealth. They learned what worked and what didn’t. They had walked in the reign of wisdom and yet the new guy eschewed their advice. We, though, have our own choice of whose advice we will follow. Will we listen to these astute elders?

And gentlemen, I am going to help you out today. I have heard men say that they will never understand women. First of all, if that is you, change your confession. Secondly, it is easy, with the accent on easy. Ask the women in your life about today’s passage or better still run an experiment. Treat them with kindness, speak nice words to them and please them. Believe me; they will do everything for you. Women are natural servants in the model of Christ. They want to do for folks. But they have to withdraw within their shells when they feel threatened. Harsh words and criticism are the quickest ways to make them retreat. But show women kindness and compassion and they will treat you like a king.  

In today’s story Rehoboam chose to use force and power to make the people treat him like a king. The people reacted by withdrawing from him. They all went home to their own tents, to their own tribes and his kingdom immediately shrunk. That is the way people always react to harsh treatment. Had he listened to the elders he could have easily maintained the vast kingdom that his father and grandfather had carved out. Instead, he began the destruction of the kingdom. It was all so easy. All he had to do was to choose his words more carefully and be kind to folks. He would have reigned in glory.

We can learn a valuable lesson from Rehoboam’s foolishness. Apply kindness and win the world.